EXAM SCHEDULER ALGORTIHM

PEACEFUL TRANQUIL WATER,WHAM EVERYTHING IS IN CHAOS COZ SOMETHINGS JUST HAVE TO BUTT IN IT.THIS TIME ITS EXAMS DAMN IT!!
Exams are the most annoying phase in any students life. Atleast for me.cramping with tight schedules that I ll never follow, and also extra curiicular activites like going online, chatting on fone etc., have to fit in the day adding to this getting tensed having cold hands, waking up early doing favours to your friends (explaining) and receiving favours(getting explained), having all the unnecessary talk in the worl at the most not appropriate time.I donno if it is funny but I bond more woth my mom during exams,I bond with people well during exams, people I never expect tot alk to I talk coz anything is better than the freaking books and god for saken exams.Then the morning starts with a silence Armageddon with the alarm and as it is common sense wins sometimes and I force my self to get up.The chilling wind forces u to suit up(ya I watch how I met your mother:D),and the u try to scrap in few minutes of sleep even though u know u cannot actually have the satisfaction of sleeping , it comforts me somehow.then nforcing dad to get ready quickly,hurrying to college for last minute revisions and thn running to exam hall as u genly are late and then finally faced with the devil itself the question paper awaits you on your table.A quick scan to see if u can pass the exam,once you are satisfied you start writing quickly coz very soon the pace is gonna die and sleep is gonna kick in. 3 hours would seem like forever until u reach last 30 mins which seem to whiling away as if its just 5 seconds.The walk of exit hehe is there....Then there will always be a gang of people who discuss the technical aspects of the paper, a group that will sulk about it, then there are people who start quickly coz of transportation problems,I hang around just long enough to know if everyones sucked or not and short enough not to sulk about it.waiting for the freaking bus is the most slow and troutous part of the day ,once u are in it u strt planning subconsciously for ur next exam or just go dumb.everything comes to standstill wen I reach home take my lunch into my room switch on my pc watch some decent serial or movie and close my door and shut all tht nonsense away. A decent nap and the cycle repeats again.
Funny thing is all this trouble can be avoided.exam could be plain and simple where I revise before exam write it come home and prepare for the next.Thats how it used to be until I entered 2004 and life took a head turn in past one year.well what can I say ,this is how growing up is gonna be,most straightforwards things are complicated like hell.When u re small and if u dint like someone u just say “KATIF” and thn make new frnds or shift to newer circle, but now saying that involves many other intricacies.donno whether that’s better or the former one.may be my next blog will be about that. For now I just wanted to log my exam preparation schedule online.
P.S:moral: don’t crap ur prepn like I do.hope I learn and thgn or 2.

FLICKA

i wantd to write about some touchy movie and well this was the latest one tht i gotta watch and it touches one like hell.its about this pretty black horse named flicka who is from this breed of arrogant horses whom no one wants to tame.so they are usually left at the mercy of lions etc., then there this grl called katie who is totally into horses and falls in love with this beautiful creature.then begins the wonderful story where she tames it ,her father sells her off and she finally gets her back on tht stormy night where flicka to save katie fights with a lion gts h urt but beats death and finally they live happily.these kind of endings dont really happen but it was nice to have to see this misty movie which gives u a sigh of relief.there was a touch in tht horse tht makes u feel so close to all this magical story.i think everyone can emphatise this at some point or the other. its about freedom,its about hope and most importantly its about unconditional love,the love thtat is so hard to find,the unselfish love of the horse towards the gal and likewise.i think animals define love with their innocence,they help humans get in touch with that facet of them which is usually lost in the hectic thing. i guess babies do tht too but well m nt a gr8 fan of thm so i stick to my flicka.............i had a flicka it was nt the happy ending tht was there in the movie but i m lucky to actually have had one,it gave me my hope,love and it gave me strength and courage. i dont think he realizes that but i do...............

Smoke away

With the success of my previous low budget blog hehe i ve now started this high fledged serial.As usual i do run out of topics to write .i wanted to write a burning social issue smoking but what the heck smokers smoke non smokers complain,if cigarette is banned something wud happen but hell the governement has to run rite.Non smokers dont really care much that they actually raise a protest against smoking publicly,then the wise governement would actually have smooking rooms like loos at every corner,but come yaar ab 5 min agar kuch ham inhale(nt so good at hindi) kar hi liye to kya hoga,ab roads pe bait kar hum thode hi hartaal karenge,we are middle class ppl ,we ve to wrok to feed our family.
thts the general attitude of the middle class public.lil do they realise tht by doing so they are nt just creating an unsafe envionment for the future
for their family but their kids have more chances of getting into these stuff as they get intrigued by seeing ppl smoke publicly.middle class complains,lower class bears it all and higher class are the ones who actually do these stuff or are nt bothered much.middle class always get crushed is my feeling partly coz i m in it i guess.i think being in the middle of nything is always gonna be this way.if u re too good u dont ve to worry and if u re too worse u dont really care much ,but the problem comes wen u re just an average u actually ve to worry if u dont make? it will u make it ?
topic deviation is my flair :).nywyas u ll never be in the middle or be just an average if u actually stop complaining and enjoy as it is and work for the top.who knows u might just end up beating all the top guys or ull feel content tht u atleast gave a shot.so where was i? yaaa non smokers next time dont complain do something or dont bother leka pote u l lalways feel miserable.PS: u can apply this in all ur facets of life.

IS DER A TOMORROW WITOUT HOPE?

Life is screwed up ,god it hardly makes sense now.everything seemed so crystal clear just a few months back now......its just so damn twisted.I guess i m overreacting for some of the apparent unfairness in life but i ve gt a plan. A plan is all it takes for hopeless man to spring into action.Anyways wanted to write a lot of things in my blog.......but well time for a fresh start so i ll do that.This is something thats been in debate for a long time atleast for me.EXISTENCE OF GOD? Does he really?how?when?what? a lot comes into our mind.here i would like to cite one of my insightful grandpas ..citation....there was man in his neightbhouring house and after many many years of devotion,they could finally conceive a kid.the man used to take utmost care of his son,bathe him daily,love him and nourish him.one fine day while he was bathing his son ,the son collapsed ...tht was the end of it.the man had lost it ,everything,he had only one consolation to think that god is there he took my son and is looking after him.tht was the only way how the man could survive,could get on with his life with some strength......so my grandfather just told me that day whats the use of debating on that if god is there he i s there if he is not there fine but its ok to believe he is there because that gives us courage to go on,that man needed that and god was the only way he could get that,otherwise he would have been totally broken man or may nt be alive for that matter. There wouldnt be a tomorrow for him.The gist here is sometimes its ok to believe something thats not totally true coz there is no harm in it but it is just a way to heal urself.Well i being the way i am getting overwhelmed with previous generations and condemning them like every othr gen next..... m perfect atheist.i just say one thing false hope may be ok for now,but in the long run it ll hurt us even more.Statistics seem to show atheists more as psychos compared god fearing counterparts in society.Living in an illusion,leaving things to someone not there,it does comfort us.Godfearing ppl are always limited in their brutality to the society.Looks like living a lie is better than sulking and spreading ur dark aura around.Knowledge and analyzing is of what use when they only worsen ur pain.So i decided that it is wise to trod for once a path followed by the herd but knowing that u re just in a dream.After all we fake all our emotions.To get over stuff we fake to be happy,to not hurt others ,to gt something,to not let thm kno what u re u fake it all.This is not a big thing,its just one of the many lies that one has to contend with to make his journey a bit more tranquil.But sometimes there comes a vent and u want to break loose,thats some deadly leap which ll hurt ur defense like hell ,tht the possibility of breaking it down is more.Life is fullof lies,defense to protect urself from getting hurt,however lately my defense seems to ve gone weak or its seems to ve shielded down coz of vexation of this whole delusion,once u think what the hell,lets live normally,lets let our guards down and booom the worst what u feared the most happens.u gt hurt and now u re making pathetic attempts to mend it............ull be successful if u believe ther is someone behind u to make u successful. I want to believe that ....i want to recuperate my broken soul, i want to believe i can,becoz i ve someone who looks after me.I want to believe my plan will work out coz its my last thread of hope.Its difficult to mend nything especially matters as delicate as close to u, wen a series of arrows pierce u ,u ve to fall down And give in but i would like to believe i ve strength to gt back up and resurrect my defenses.It might be an illusion but it surely gives me some light in my dark room,its an oasis in dessert which keeps me going in my path,not giving in and falling down.
I guess thats what keeps so many millions of victims, sufferers going all over the world.i cudnt for the world imagine how so many ppl who ve lost many more in massacres gt over it resurrected their lives and those of their coming generations.i guess its hope that there is still better to come that kept them going.............if they had none of that we would not have any of all this.A man without hope is just living dead man.......some ppl get close to it.............some are just that.......some like me would like to belive that they are not so and pick up thread frm there on.............

i ve been writing so much but i think i cannot post it yet its too.....lite le
so again grooving in my age old habit of musing....today we talk about ..i dont know......lets take a day of my gr8 life like today ..

PART 1

Hmmmmmmmm I started with writing about friends but, felt I m nt yet ready to write about it as of now(emotional subconscious) ,so its due for next time. Lately I m going through rough phase and I hardly recognize what happened to me. I don’t remember h ow I was before, when I stopped being what I was and became what I m now.So this blog is to reminisce one of most sought after(in my family) adventure of a lifetime. My co partner in this fiasco is my dear brother prashanth.
I was 12 years old then and without care of the world.i was just this gal with my head always in books knowing no pleasure of life. My brother was though a complete opposite.He was this cool kid who used to make my boring life hell. Its funny I never thought I would say this but I miss my hell.I just finished with my exams and was gearing up for a boring monotonos summer except little did I know that this was going to be a different one.For the first time my parents decided that we should go to our grandparents place in madras without them alone.Of course my moms brother, our uncle accompanied us in the journey.Looking back now I hardly remember the journey coz maybe I was asleep as soon as I gt into the train.i tend to sleep heavily by 8 30.i was woken up by my uncle.i gt down quickly and stood like a doll. My uncle gave me a small water bottle to carry and I was like I was carrying the whole load making grunts and everything. He had no other go but to relieve me off myburden. When I gt out onto the platform, we were greeted by stinking smell of fish all over and live fish on the ground beating for its life. We just walked through like it was some wonderland with open mouth.there was also this strange language that everyone conversed in. it added to the mystery. We finally reached our grandmas place and rested happily,dined heavily.At grandmas place along with grandpa, my bachelor uncle used to stay.two days went by swiftly and pleasantly.Now u know how bachelor uncles are, they think they are the most disciplined and think its their responsibility to make everyone else follow their monotony.I was shocked to know 5 in the morning would be so dark.WE were woken up by him, and asked to fetch milk by the corner of street. Now we are kids but not innocent, we were like we don’t know language e and stuff like that.The thing here one should understand is bribery starts at very young age, we were told we cud buy our own chocolates with left over amount. We jumped at the proposal and ran along the cold dark streets memorizing what we shld say to shopkeeper.When we finally reached the shop we forgot and just showed milk packet and 2 chocolates.Then we spent later part of the day with out grandpa asking us logical or math questions ,whoever answered is supposed to get like rs20 . we maintained a log book for that.Daily afternoon we were avid viewers of THE CENTURIONS. We decided our characters in that already and lived every episode.One week passed by quickly and then as we would have it we gt bored, missed our parents felt the schedule tightening around us.so we decided to call. We planned our call ver carefully. My brother would take bath and I would be in the attached room.he would stake out ny intruders(my uncle ,grandma) I would mak the call.i made the call and was my sweet moms tone, but was greeted with some gibberish crap.tried twice and met the same outcome.Then we figured out something was wrong , we enquired our grandpa carefully like we are asking for knowledge or something carefully gt the std code for our place and thn spoke to my mom next day like our lives depended on it,told her ‘there is no much time,call us in the nite,don’t let nyone kno we called u’. we may ve been a tad bit carried over by centurions.thn we argued daily for centurions coz it clashed with news.my mom called and we acted like we were surprised and she said she ll come as soon as she can possible a week.A lot happened in the following week.
Now there was this puja room,my bro and I pray daily for 30 min( we would like to concentrate on all gods).One fine day my brother did not come out even after 30 min and I was kinda losing my patience.i was walking to and fro with frustration wen he came outside suddenly and dragged me inside.what he showed me nex t is nothng less to fantasy land.

PART 2

We saw toys,all sorts of,purses, glittery stuff,accessories,handy stuff and more toys.its like toyland oly everything for free. We dint kno what to do. We did oly one thng which we cud think of. I divereted my grandma with cooking and complimentary talk and my bro tooksome stuff packed in our suitcase. We carried this installment business daily and one day the worst happened ,our grandma caught us,but instead of scolding she showed us new places where we cud fine more stuff.basically our uncle used to own shop which he gt rid off now after he gt into stock business.everyday became investing day ,we dint want to do nythng wrong. So we gt up on time had math sessn on time, foregone almost all the stuff except centurions and swat kats(btw I m eraser).Slowly our othr cuzns the twins dropped in along with some more cousins.
We used to have a ball.WE used to play tennis I was no good but all my bros tried to teach me a lot.then we made bow and arrow and played a lot.there were these fat tamil guys in next apartment and they used to make fun of our gang. Sometimes ppl snap and I did so once.i just hit them with my arrow and we all took off in gr8 hurry.Dint go out for like 3 days I think.Then there was this crazy lady downstairs we used to stare at.Then we used to maintain our grandmas garden daily and only once went with her to the most busiest market ever. I don’t remember much, I remebr I was pushed like hell and ya that’s it. We went to kishkinta, it was a gr8 place I had my fist Columbus ride, I was scared like hell and made to look after another kid.Hated every moment but seeing her cry, I think that was the first time when I did not cry inspite of so wanting to cry.My first brush with video games wen we went to that big video game place, I dontrember thename. But it was perfect. We manipulated our uncle to buy us more coins to play,manipulation meaning in the lowest form, by making big eyes and all that crap. Hehe. Then we went for ymca, the biggest swimming pool or something, I think I walked in water mostly, splashed it along, cudnt learn swimming bcoz I cudnt trust my bros theory of lfoating in water.
Everyone wanted in on everything.frm centurion characters t o fantasy items. We argues abt everything like hell hid everything sat on our suitcases wen elders walked in.Infact we dint ve time to talk to our parents either.Then they say u shld not wake a sleeping lion.Well my cousins did wake me up per se.They wanted one of my purses and they were like u re a gal u don’t need and snatched it from me. I warned thm I would tell to my uncle.They did not heed to me, they crossed their line and off I went .I don’t like to be dominated or nythng even if that meant I would go down with them.It was a long while ago I don’t remember what happened after that but I do remember I stil have that purse in my stuff and a lot of othr stuff which we hid in our secret compartment.so wenw e were busted me and prash ly lost like 30% of our stuff unlike others who stashed everything at a place.
Weird though, all the stuff that we lifted were never used.they are still hanging around unused and new.But whenever I see them when dusting around etc.; I think everytime I explore them like it’s the first time with same awe of fantasy.It was my wonderland.For me that summer was not just about hanging around, it was about independence,exploring,bonding and dare i add meticulous planning(he he) and our entry into crime world.There was something about me then ,that i m missing now, it cud be the fun, it cud be the living in the moment concept, it could just be ignorance i m nt sure, wat i m sure of though is
woh lamhe jo guzar gaye
phir kyun nahi aa jaaye
shayad woh lamhe yaad karne ke liye hi hain
jab hamara dil gumsum sa hain
i m getting better at this i guess.