There are instances or moments in life when you stand back form the crowd, everything comes to stand still. You walk around analyzing things that matter, setting your priorities straight and redefining yourself. Well for me ……….that sucks .I never get it how it strike us all of a sudden…it just crap right. On other hand I stand still, I stagnate and I know I just cant get in or get the hell out of there. Because life is full of boundaries…u set them to have space, u need space from your other life, the life with family, friends, foes, to just remain sane. To get through all this in one piece, I fence my self. The thing is more often than not I over step them. Because the space I am talking abt becomes too heavy for me ….I would need someone. And when I do that I realize it becomes too congested for me. So I draw another circle around me. This is a cyclic process resulting in a set of concentric circles. Now it’s just a dot, a dot space for me. That’s where I am now, balancing on that dot. But the thing is even this dot is too much for me and too less for others to come in. therefore now I am all alone just as I started out, standing still on the shore away from ocean but the water still touches me in the form of tide.
The peace u derive though beats the hell out of an open pool where there are things ur conscious of, things on ur mind, people to indulge in. Its like this proverb, better alone than bad company. I always thought this was confusing, it dazes me often to wonder which one is better…being shutdown from others or merrily basking company. wat I want to say in the end pretty much amounts to nothing.
Life is complicated as heaven and as if that’s not enough I make it even more ………I don’t know guess I coin in a new word myself.